One Act Play: Surviving in the Near Wilderness

Running Away

Me: Chuck! [alarmed. Chuck is eating a possibly rabid, possibly avian-flu carrying and decaying dead bird] Our insurance won’t cover avian flu for a dog. Drop it. DROP IT NOW.

Chuck: chomp, chomp, chomp, wha…??

Me: Give!

Chuck: [swallows] Runs off to pee. On the corner of the cabin.

Me: CHUCK! We do not pee on the house. Come to me now.

Chuck: [takes the widest possible arc away from me and runs to the porch of the cabin, wags tail hopefully] Can we go in to the warm cabin now?

Newer Comments →
  • http://hillbillyplease.blogspot.com/ Jagosaurus

    Awwww … what a fun game. Sounds very much like the one where I chase one cat around trying to prevent him from eating what the other one just threw up.

  • http://maxgus.blogspot.com/ napangel

    Birds can’t carry rabies, ya nut.

  • http://www.reformedstrippersanon.blogspot.com JessicaRabbit

    He just wanted his own special holiday feast. And holiday weewee. He’s festive, thats all.

  • Dr. To You

    Hey Jon—what is that pink spot on Chuck’s…anus? Did he sit on a candy cane? :)

    Rabies? Where was that reference?

  • http://www.ransom-note-typography.com jon deal

    Don’t feel too bad, Chuck; I get in trouble when I pee in the corner, too.

  • Phlounder

    napangels right birds don’t carry rabies.

    And, I know this is none of my business but why does Chuck’s ass appear to be so red? (it happened to my dog when he was younger. he’d get…bowel…problems and the area would get a little irritated.)

  • TripTikGirl

    Chuck was probably EATING candy canes..not sitting on them! :D

  • http://plazajen.blogspot.com Jennifer in Kansas City

    Let me guess: you don’t let Chuck lick your face very much, do ya?

    Oh, and just because some science-based probably-educated people think evil dead birds aren’t rabies carriers, doesn’t MEAN they’re not carriers. Carriers OF IRONY. :arches eyebrow, promotes paranoia:

  • http://decadently.net/ marie b.

    that photo is classic, as is the accompanying blurb.

  • moonrattled

    That photo makes him look like ‘Hop along Chuckity’.

  • Phlounder

    If he ate them then he sure as hell didn’t digest them very well…

  • http://mundaneblog.blogspot.com/ p miller

    from the photo it looks like he alreay passed the bird and it looks like it was painful. he needs hemroid cream :)

  • totem-tactics

    rosey-cheeked armstrong!!
    would make a good play but how will u get chuck do an encore???

  • southerngirl

    Chuck is so beautifully well trained. Will you be using the same techniques with Leta?

  • http://www.iprettymuchhateeverything.com Torrie

    Maybe chuck should come live with me.
    We have no problem peeing on houses in THIS family.

  • Laziza

    Honestly, why all the comments about the dog’s butt? It’s just … weird.

    Jon: So? Was it socks?

  • paula

    Well, he peed outside at least…we can overlook the fact that he peed ON the house. Aren’t you glad he didn’t roll on the dead bird before he ate it?

    Dogs are so funny.

  • http://www.prideman.blogspot.com Typical Gay Man

    Well, I’d have to say it wasn’t socks. If it was, I doubt he would have lived long enough to make this post. Just an observation. I think Heather is the bestest, but I would NEVER want to incure her displeasure. I have sensetive skin and it melts easilly.

  • http://www.julienet.atfreeweb.com/retreat/ Prairie Dweller

    Every dog has at least one totally disgusting habit. I have two dogs. Each of them has a different disgusting habit. I wish that their disgusting habits were as mild as Chuck’s.

  • http://www.nothingbutbonfires.com Nothing But Bonfires

    The grass kind of looks like blonde hair with really bad roots.

  • Starla Dear

    My 6-pound Yorkie has eaten or attempted to eat a fieldmouse, a frog and a half-dead bird. I try to repress these occurrences from memory when she tries to give kisses. Oh, and she loves to roll around in stuff too, if she gets the chance. Dogs!

  • Jennifer in Ohio

    I love how he’s so puppy-like! Did he get to play with Bo on this trip?

  • http://www.rathnait.net/blog Zee

    Sorry to comment on your latest post here, but wanted to leave a link to another fantastic shrimp/scallops recipe: http://​www​.epicurious​.com/​r​e​c​i​p​e​s​/​r​e​c​i​p​e​_​v​i​e​w​s​/​v​i​e​w​s​/​104390

    It’s a thai-inspired recipe and uses thai chilis and thai green curry paste so it can be kind of spicy, but definitely easy and worth the effort. Hope you enjoy!
    ~Zee

  • http://deejaneyisat.blogspot.com/ DeeJaney

    Pardon me for saying so, but I’m shocked at all the “Chuck Butt” comments that have erupted as a result of Jon’s latest post. I mean to say, it’s wonderful to be astute…but perhaps certain readers are paying a wee bit too much attention to detail!!:D

  • christa

    I just ordered my chuck calendar. I’m so excited. I look forward to other blurbodoocery items in the future.

Newer Comments →