I am dying

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Ok. I’m not dying, except in the way that we are all dying, but it sure feels like I’ve been close to death. Today is the first day in well over a week where I’ve been out of bed longer than 38 seconds. Heather made a stellar batch of scrambled eggs and I’ve been able to keep them down.

While I’m out of bed, I’m skiving off on the couch. I’m going to try to shower and shave, and hopefully that won’t include feeling like barfing or huddling over the toilet waiting for the inevitable.

For the record, I do not have West Nile virus. But it’s pretty clear that I’ve got something else pretty nasty. I’ve wondered if the stressful stuff in our lives hasn’t caught up with me. That isn’t whining as much as it is coming to terms.

I may call my doctor to give me some migraine meds to see if that will help. I woke up this morning with another devastating headache, popped an 800mg ibuprofen and went back to sleep and the headache has softened with breakfast and coffee. I haven’t been able to finish my breakfast or dinner meals for longer than a week. Even getting down a cup of coffee has required a lot of work. GEORGE!’s father referred to me as a “candyass” and I told him I’ve got at least 6 ounces of ass he can kiss. He laughed and then made a joke about our unmowed lawn.

Yesterday was the worst for the headaches by far. We were planning on an ER visit this morning, but after breakfast, I’m feeling much better than the entire last week. I don’t have much energy, but I can move my head without wanting someone to bash it with a 16lb. maul. So I’ve got that going for me.

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  • http://miniaturerose.blogspot.com Rose

    Sending good thoughts your way.

  • http://wordsend.org/ Vika Zafrin

    Get well, mon. I saw someone in THE Clogs at a market today and thought of you†ñ and I’ve never even seen you live. The power of the internets is unstoppable, and it’s cheering for your recovery.

  • http://www.isoglossia.com s gazzetti

    All my sympathy. Sounds like you’ve investigated all likely culprits for this (I mean, WNV? WTF?), but your symptoms sound a great deal like those of the horrific food poisoning I contracted a few years back (tainted ribeye, apparently).

    Glad to have an update. Be careful with all the whining, though; judging by Heather’s inbox, the Armstrong family is holding a gun to the internet’s head and forcing everyone to listen to how hard it is to be you.

  • http://www.isoglossia.com s gazzetti

    (That last part was intended to be irony)

  • scargosun

    Jon, the last time I had the exact same symptoms was a nasty stomach virus. I get migraines too and they are worse when you are dehydraed from constantly tossing your cookies. It took me 3 days to eat very tiny amounts of food and another 3 to actually feel human. Don’t worry, you’ll get there. I konw it REALLY sucks.

  • http://www.crazymadmomma.blogspot.com DDM

    Gah! I’m so sorry Jon, and I hope you feel better soon. I’ve been a migraine sufferer for 20 years, so I can fully appreciate the misery of the headache that won’t stop. I wonder if your blood work would look any different this far into whatever this bug is? Headaches that last more than a day or two make me really, really nervous. I hope the tiny bit of good you’re feeling this morning, sticks around!

  • http://sadandbeautiful.typepad.com Sarah

    While I’m glad its not WNV, I understand how incredibly frustrating it is when you have no answers as to why you are feeling this way.
    I’ve had several trips to doctors to ask about something in the past and always get “I’ve never seen that before.” Comforting!
    I truly hope you get some answers and feel better soon so you can get back to enjoying life!

  • oromat

    Blech. You sound pregnant :)

  • http://www.dooce.com Jennifer in Ohio

    I’m no doctor- but I hope your doctor has ruled out bacterial and/or viral meningitis.

    I seem to remember reading that flu-like symptoms combined with headaches or neck pain were the things to look out for.

    Take care.

  • ortizzle

    Dear oh dear. I sincerely hope you are beginning to feel better than the anguished face in this post. Please keep on *crockin’* and get well soon!

  • rockr girl

    i hope you begin to feel better soon.

    as a chronic migraine sufferer, i can certainly empathize on the hell that is migraines. and i am sure they are not helping any with the nausea – mine often are accompanied by what can only be akinned to the type of smell/taste hypersensitivity that many pregnant women have in their first tri-mester. migraines = barfing in my house.

    but, let me offer you as much advice on the migraine front as i possibly can.
    if at all possible, try to keep some food on your stomach – snacking on bland things like rice and crackers is a good way to combat the nausea.
    keep caffiene in your system – it helps to open up your blood vessels, and the pain of migraine is the constriction of blood vessels behind your occular cavity.
    read up on, practice and use bio-feedback. its a form of meditaion in which you slow your body’s rhythm and use relaxation techniques to reduce pain.
    wear socks – keeping your feet warm helps circulation.
    and last, but not least, if you can take plain aspirin, it works wonders on migraines – especially paired with some caffiene, and claratin/loratadine (if you have sinus pressure as well).

    i hope you find out what it is that is causing this. you will remain in my thoughts.

    oh, and stop groping your wife.

  • http://www.eighthourlunch.com Eight Hour Lunch

    Bad, bad advice. Groping is certainly advised. Hell, if you can’t use illness as an excuse to cop a feel then what is the point of even getting up?

    P.S., I heard the best thing for a migrane is the hot combo. And it weighs to much to toss, so you’re safe there, too.

  • http://www.williamstiteler.com Bill

    Jon,

    Not sure, but some of your symptoms sound like Giardia:

    http://www.cdc.gov/Ncidod/dpd/parasites/giardiasis/factsht_giardia.htm

    And the migranes could be a function of dyhydration. My wife had this a few years ago and it was pretty nasty.

    Hope you feel better soon.

  • http://www.dreamdust.co.uk Sarah

    Get well soon, Jon. But if it does turn out that you are pregnant, please feel free to name the baby after me. Thanks :-)

  • http://www.ransom-note-typography.com jon deal

    Migraines + nausea = misery.

    Hope you get well soon.

    Want me to come over and mow your lawn? I haven’t mowed mine in over a month, so I’m a bit out of practice, but I’m sure I could figure it out.

  • barb

    Glad it is not WNV, and be sure to talk to your doctor about your migraine-like pain. Butalbital will work for head pain, is cheap, but is sedating. Go for the triptan samples, though. Samples to try – because an RX is expensive, but they work pretty well. Triptans are non-sedating – treat the nausea, light sensitivity, and most importantly the pain. Next time treat as early as possible. Better odds at knocking it out with less medicine.

    Biofeedback is worthwhile but difficult to do while you feel like your head is in a vice.

  • http://perfectpeacefarm.blogspot.com gordon

    Not EEP (Equine Ensphilidous)? Then again viral infections all seem to start out the same…get better soon sir!

  • Kelly S.

    Migraine tip (another one): For migraines and viral infections, my physician gives me a Myers Cocktail. The Myers Cocktail is an IV full of B’s, zinc, C, calcium, and magnesium. It is the calcium and magnesium that positively affect the migraine. It works miracles, but sometimes when I’m really down and out I need one a day for a few days to blow out whatever is ailing me, in addition to rest, fluids, etc. I’m in Seattle, so I don’t know if one could find this in your neck of the woods. Naturopaths often dispense these, as well as M.D.’s. If nothing else, it is a good way to give your body more antibodies to keep fighting the infection.

    Oy… so sorry to hear about this. It has been a hard few years; you might be right about things catching up with you. It happens sometimes. The upside is that shitstorms have a tendency to pass.

  • ryan

    hey Jon, I’m glad you don’t have {insert panic inducing disease here}. At least it isn’t WNV… although the constant headaches are always a killer.

    Get well…

  • ryan

    I love the pic by the way… really brings the feeling across…

  • http://www.lateshow.org Chris

    I gotta say, that guy looks gastro-intestinally challenged, at best. Of course, it could also be that he’s having hot pokers shoved up his ass.

    I’m kind of on the fence with this one.

  • http://byjane.livejournal.com ByJane

    Have you seen a neurologist? I don’t want to sound any alarms, but you need to rule out cerebral aneurysms. Trust me…I’ve been there. The ambulance guys delivered me to the hospital where they and everyone else were sure that, in the words of my doctor, I was just “another middle-aged woman with a migraine.” They were pumping me full of migraine medicine, and nothing was working. Then I threw up on them. Then they decided maybe they ought to get a CAT scan. And there it was, a by-then ruptured cerebral aneurysm. Six weeks later, I left the hospital.

    I’m not suggesting that that’s at all what you have, Jon, but…but…get it checked out, will ya.

  • http://www.blurbomat.com blurb

    Thanks for the links and the kind wishes.

    For the record, diarrhea as not been a part of this round of sickness. Plus, my blood work showed no signs of bacterial infection, including meningitis.

  • http://cowjumpmoon.blogspot.com Shalini

    get well soon! I hope it will pass soon! Keep motoring!

  • moonrattled

    Um, coffee? When you’re this sick? People get headaches coming off of caffeine, so putting it into your body isn’t going to help. If you’ve attracted a nasty virus it’s a wake up call that your immune system isn’t at its peak, so how about some heavy duty cleansing foods – raw vegetables, fruits, and lean proteins. Start the day with fresh lemon juice in warm water and drink plenty of water throughout the day.

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