I Tried Not to Freak Out

Warning: bug-related post ahead. Proceed at your own risk.

photo taken by mjswart

I was with the dogs in the backyard a couple of nights ago and saw the weirdest flying bug ever. It had smallish wings, a weird body that was kind of bee/wasp colored and a long tail that was basically a large pine needle. By large I mean at least 3 inches. How the thing was flying, I have no idea. I freaked out and spun around to grab something to smash it (I thought that tail might be used to suck my brain out and transmit it to a waiting craft, hovering in geosynchronous orbit). Nearest tool was a shovel. Not the most graceful thing to swing at a bug that might have a deadly venom. I missed. It went away. I got the dogs inside and couldn’t get the image out of my head. I’m uncomfortable typing this right now. Bugs like that are supposed to live in the south. Or midwest. Not in the rockies.

I’ve spent a great deal of time researching what the hell the bug could have been and the best I could come up with was a mayfly. Flickr reveals some things. This one is close. Look at this sucker! See also.

I’m going to shower. And then climb in my hyperbaric chamber for a spell.

katlynn125

You’re right — it’s most definitely a mayfly, and yes they inhabit the south. Growing up on Lake Murray in Columbia, SC, I’d have to endure the 11th plague every summer — swarms of these stupid things by the thousands. Be glad it was just one. Icky.
http://rainylakechick.blogger.com rainylakechick

That’s totally a “fish fly”, aka a may fly. We call ‘em fish flies in Minnestoa because in June they all hatch and then die and the fish eat the dead ones on the lake. If you think that’s scary, see 1000s of dead fish fly carcasses floating on the lake and all you want to do is jump in.

And they are so harmless, even little kids can catch them. Hence this shot.
http://johnlejeune.com/The_Blog/The_Blog.php JohnLeJeune

Jon,

That is a hexigenia mayfly I think. If you were a trout fisherman you would now be speeding to your nearest trout stream to participate in a fishing event fly fishers wait years for. Have no fear. Most mayflies emerge from the water sans mouths. They can’t bite you or sting you but if you were another mayfly they could show you a real good time! They only leave their aquatic world for a few days to have sex and then die. Truly a beautiful and harmless insect. Trout think of them as a double whopper with cheese.
Spatula

My god, you are a bigger man than I. Both in the sense that you had the wherewithal to photograph this thing, whereas I would have just started crying and run away. And in the sense that I’m a woman.
meowsk

Yikes! That thing better not fly down to my house. I don’t care what anyone says about that thing being harmless just LOOK at it — it’s terrifying.
TriptikGirl

We call them fish flies in Michigan. They only live 24 hours, enough time to hatch, breed, and die. They don’t have mouths, so they don’t eat or bite. And if you drive over them on the road, their crushed bodies smell like fish and they can sometimes cause slippery spots on the pavement.

I HATE them! Thankfully, this years’ hatchings weren’t so bad.
ronbailey

If you are accurate about the size, it’s definitely one of the Hexigenias — probably Hexagenia Limbata. Kinda rare for Utah!
http://www.brianfending.com/ brianfending

Yep, mayflies… My undergrad town in Western NY (right on Lake Erie) has an infestation every few years and they coat the library. Not as bad as this, though: (danger: oogie alert) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NfJDbwnfPck
http://craybickford.blogspot.com ricabicka

I see these all the time in NH — they look like enormous mosquitos!! Scary!
VinnyGirl

Thank God I’ve never seen one of these in Georgia. I don’t care how harmless they are.…far as i am concerned, just seeing one could cause a heart attack for me.
http://www.openedgemedia.com devenson

It’s a stonefly.
lucaseth

In Ky we call them Galanippers(spelling?)
my SIL swears they are GIANT mosquitos!!
and is terrified of them…
http://onepingonly.blogspot.com/ Maura

The one you said looks close appears to be an Ichneumon Wasp. From what I found, they are harmless to humans and trees, and in fact help to keep many insect pests under control because their larvae feed on and destroy many insects injurious to humans and plants.

Doesn’t mean they don’t look freaky, though.
Kristie

One at a time, they’re just a little bit freaky. En masse, they’re gross.

The annual fair in my Michigan hometown is the “Bay-Rama Fishfly Festival.”

http://www.bay-rama.com/

I’m disappointed that it’s Miss Bay-Rama that is crowned, and not Miss Fishfly.
JenniK

I’ve lurked here for quite a while. Funny that *this* is the post that brings me out…

A friend of mine (who is terrified of flying insects in general) in Pittsburgh had the same sort of bug land dead on his porch a while ago. He had no idea what it was, either.

The photo he took of his can be found at http://blurbomat.com/archives/2008/06/26/i-tried-not-to-freak-out/

Maura, it looks like you’ve solved at least my friend’s conundrum.
Jeneric

As many have noted, ’tis a mayfly. Their short life inspired the Mayfly project — http://meish.org/projects/mayfly/ — which I assume will be around again in 2008.
kris

Definitely a fish fly. Fish fly season is about a week long. They live for 24 hours and are harmless. They cover buildings and sidewalks by the thousands and they stink like fish. Shop owners have to shovel them off of the walks like snow. Teenagers spin donuts in fish fly covered parking lots.

We even have a festival for the awful things.
http://www.bay-rama.com
http://www.flickr.com/photos/indiglogust/ Victoria Wa

Every year around this time tons of those are everywhere in Montreal, Quebec. We call them shadflies and they are really harmless. You can pick them up by the wings and there bodies wiggle around and then you let them go and they flitter off. They can cover the street and walls like this.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/72feetabovesealevel/ michael

Gorgeous photo, but I’m a bug and grub kinda guy.
JenniK

Oh crud, I just realized I linked to your very own post there! Sheeoot. That would be because I just linked him to this entry.

What my friend saw is over here: http://i19.photobucket.com/albums/b188/bumpedcorners/WTFBug/DSCN0127.jpg

Sorry about that.
patrickc

Jon, you are one gigantic pansy. Man-up and kill that thing for cryin’ out loud.
sarah hill

that is some crazy engineering right there.
debooki

These mayflies are harmless and actually quite beautiful. I am glad you didnt kill it just because you were afraid of it…
debooki

http://www.capecodtoday.com/blogs/index.php/2008/06/19/they-re-back-cape-cod-cicada-invasion-2008?blog=132

On the topic of BUGS
Last weekend while leaviing Cape Cod; and trying to get over the bridge, all the cars were COVERED with these! It was bizarre!
http://asboringasitmaybe.blogspot.com Jakki

Yeah, it’s freaky and a little bit made-for-movie-ish but really, look at it.…very interesting.

Now after saying that, I would have freaked out and looked like a maniac trying to kill the damn thing but also run from it.

BLURBOMAT

Jon Armstrong shares photos, music, politics, hair & pants.

I Tried Not to Freak Out