Oscars™: Semi-real time
February 27th, 2005Pre-Show
We have Tivo’d the E! Live from the Red Carpet pre-show. Star Jones. Wrong. And basically, they are using Kathy Griffin to kill time in the tower. It’s horrible. I much preferred Kathy being goofy with musicians on the Grammy’s.
I miss the stoned/drunk/blitzed Joan Rivers. At least the pretense of importance was focused on the fashion and not some other thing. I have a question for the execs at E! How much did the Rivers’ people ask for? Star wasn’t worth it. Especially with The View puns.
Hillary Swank: Niptacular! Even with the tail.
Update: Star Jones is interviewing Johnny Depp. A w w w w kward. I’m having Ben Stiller movie cringe moments.
Heather: “Actors are stupid,” paraphrasing Johnny Depp.
Update 7:04pm MST (we’re on Tivo time… Leta is in bed!): Oprah is trending skinnier.
7:06pm MST: Heather [about Star Jones] “She makes me itch.”
7:10pm MST: We’ve successfully fast-forwarded through the E! show. We’re now watching the ABC version with the A-List red carpet shillery. Halle Berry vs. Jann Carl… winner is Halle Berry.
The Main Event
7:36pm MST: Standing ovation for Chris Rock?? According to Emily, it’s because they are just relieved the host isn’t Billy Crystal.
7:41pm MST: Chris Rock is funny, though.
8:00pm MST: Beth has arrived. I’m outgunned. It’s all talk of hair.
8:04pm MST: Two-thirds of the women just made fun of Renee Zellweger. Dressistootight.
8:09pm MST: There will be no spoilers here tonight. With the bourbon and the nachos and the hair talk, we’ll be lucky to get to the end.
8:14pm MST: The producers are “mixing it up” this year. “Making it pop.” Cate Blanchett is “mingling” with “the people” and announcing the Makeup nominees. There is a concensus that HBO should host the Oscars so that people can swear and stuff.
8:21pm MST: The curtain/backdrop is very 1977/Lawrence Welk. Did the budget for plasma screens end with the ceiling?
9:04pm MST: What’s with the whole 70s revival thing with the hair? Except for the homage to The Simpsons from Adam Duritz. Annette Bening is also celebrating the Simpsons.
9:26pm MST: P. Fucking Diddy. Introduced as “Sean Coombs”. We felt the ego through the time-delay and the hard drive on the Tivo.
Emily: “His eyes are awfully close together.”
I’ve never thought of Polar Express as a “hip” movie. Thanks SO MUCH Sean Coombs!
Also, Prince. He has the 70s 1964 prom queen hair!
Emily [to Prince]: “Even though your makeup is too ashy, you can do me anytime.”
9:50pm MST: Tivo lets us analyze every moment. And we caught Oprah with a black power fist. Sweet. Oprah could buy and sell half the audience. Does she need any kind of power? Hasn’t she transcended all of us?
10:03pm MST: It’s over? In my entire life, the Oscars have never ended this close to the news.
At least Heather didn’t grab the camera and start taking pictures of the TV (it’s number 26 after you click “Launch Faces”) this year. o
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February 27th, 2005 at 7:41 pm
I’m doing the same thing, so is Danny at http://www.dadgone mad.com, otherwise known as dr. johnny fever to you
February 27th, 2005 at 7:54 pm
No time to read. Must get to Armstrongs before show is over. Now Dave wants to watch. Must go see my friends quickly so I can return home to eat a late supper and put my two cute boys to bed. Stop writing and walk out the door NOW!
February 27th, 2005 at 7:55 pm
I’m live blogging, too! I was hoping we’d be in this together. IM me if you want: arielmeadow on AIM/YM.
http://electrolicious.com/archives/2005/02/live_oscar_blog.html
February 27th, 2005 at 8:25 pm
mmm, nachos.
February 27th, 2005 at 8:45 pm
Do you see how fast I got home? I only tripped through one bush. Please tell Emily, “Thank you for the yummy cookies.” Now I must go and pray.
February 27th, 2005 at 9:00 pm
Blurb: Where were you when they showed Salma’s knockers?
February 27th, 2005 at 9:13 pm
I was commenting about the hair on Salma and Penelope. Damn. Plus, kind of over the Salma boobs.
February 27th, 2005 at 9:16 pm
Oh sorry, it’s late here. I’m tired, that’s my excuse.
February 27th, 2005 at 9:16 pm
Prince was strangely subdued. But I have to say, he has the best hair of anyone there.
February 27th, 2005 at 9:21 pm
aww shit that was on tonight? Damn. Took the kids to the super cool pools at the Y, and then watched Super Size Me.
February 27th, 2005 at 9:40 pm
Emily can do way better!
February 27th, 2005 at 9:45 pm
G’night, it was fun
February 27th, 2005 at 10:03 pm
Great minds think alike. Check out what I blogged about Counting Crows (click on my URL).
February 27th, 2005 at 11:56 pm
two thirds of women including ME and my male exroommate martin.. haha and he continued to say that she is too skinny
February 28th, 2005 at 7:20 am
I love Counting Crows, and I feel the need to tell people that he dated Jennifer Aniston. Why? i don’t know. Why not. I just listened to August and Evrything After the otherr day.
February 28th, 2005 at 7:25 am
How does it always happen that when you add a new “whore” post, the comments quickly fill up with ghetto trash dissing each other and clamoring for the attention of said whore?
It’s definately the scarier side of the internets.
February 28th, 2005 at 8:37 am
I was wondering if Oprah really did throw up a Black Power fist, but I am TiVo-less and it was only for the briefest of moments. Thanks for the clarification.
February 28th, 2005 at 8:38 am
LMAO! That is from 2002…BUT they commentors write as if the P-Meister himself created the post.
February 28th, 2005 at 9:00 am
I was having dinner with Bartender Dude and co at this fairly tp (trendyposh) place and they HAD THE OSCARS ON at the bar. Now, on the one hand it was torture to miss all the clothes, but I have to say the cheesy music floating over all the diners was ridiculous. CAN’T WE EAT OUR FOIE GRAS IN PEACE? I would have preferred the Blurb’s commentary over that stupid cheesy music any day!
February 28th, 2005 at 9:03 am
Did you catch the guy sleeping in the audience? I can’t remember who it was now, but it was right after the close up of Martin Scorcese on stage giving the “blah, blah, blah” look to the guy accepting the award he presented. Our gang also caught Oprah’s black power fist. Too funny.
February 28th, 2005 at 11:51 am
God bless the Tivo! We also were able to enjoy it for all it’s craptacularity after teh kiddies went to bed. Was the hair just awful or what?? And Robert Verdi on E! with the fashion critiquing, when his teeth where brighter than the sun? I HATED the fact that they had all the “techies” up on stage, tehn kept cutting their speeches off. Granted, I don’t care WHO they thanked, I was going to fast forward anyway, but the producers gave more time to the actors walking on stage AS PRESENTERS than they gave to teh winners of the freakin’ awards. Rock was right, at that rate, next year will just be a drive through in the parking lot…
February 28th, 2005 at 12:55 pm
Star Jones is the most horrible person for that job, she is jsut a walking pile of crap. She should have been the fat naked person in saw trying to get through the razor wires.
Yeah i hate her, I do - she is a hypocrite that thinks she can get away with things cause she is black. She is like the Oprah Mini-me. Hmmmm wait both Oprah and Star are Fat Black women with huge egos talk shows and the “holier then thou” attitude…hmmm makes you think.
February 28th, 2005 at 2:31 pm
Funny stuff, man. We also loved Adam’s Sideshow Bob hair. (Although my wife, who doesn’t really know the show, kept saying he looked like “that cave guy from the Simpsons!” Took me a few minutes to figure that one out.)
I was pretty disappointed with the Oscars this year. Not by the winners–I agreed with all four acting Oscars for the first time in years. But their choice of presenters was weak. I love Prince, but what does he have to do with anything? And P Diddy? Is he even popular anymore? Maybe I’m old and out of touch. Also, I like Beyonce, but it would have been nice to see someone from the Phantom singing the song from that movie. It just seemed like they tried to prove that they were multiculturally friendly by throwing us random black celebs, even if they didn’t fit the moment.
Oh, and Blurb? Thanks for the laughs. The comments on your old P. Diddy post are priceless. I have to wonder about people who think a post ABOUT a celeb is actually a post BY a celeb. Especially when the post is so negative.
February 28th, 2005 at 2:49 pm
That whore Travolta. He was on Letterman last week promoting ‘Be Cool’ and had a short tight caesar cut. One week later and he has long slicked back Pulp Fiction bangs? C’mon. Vain Ho.
February 28th, 2005 at 3:16 pm
I only took pictures of the TV once. Well, it wasn’t really pictures. I had the camcorder. I was like 12, so I get a dispensation for that, right?