Making Time
July 13th, 2005I would love to say that this road trip all began in the Polo Lounge at the Beverly Hills Hotel with a mysterious telex. However, this trip has been in the works for a few years. No mysteries. Since the three of us met via band in middle and high school, it seemed only natural to do a musically based road trip.
Our goal was to start in Cleveland and end up in Memphis. We are currently taking a break from music and focusing on bourbon. My boys JB and McQueen have arranged for us to hit the Maker’s Mark distillery tomorrow morning. I’ve been to wineries and if Red Hook or Granville Island count, a brewery or two. I’m giddy to see how the magic christmasness of bourbon happens up close and personal. Plus, I love the vibe of the Maker’s Mark brand.
We stopped last night in Columbus, to see an alma mater (JB) and bar crawl. Surprisingly, only one major discussion broke out, with McQueen taking on a role, usually taken by my older brother, of devil’s advocate using a kind of badgering technique that inflames the discussion until one of us is crying. It’s been 18 years since we’ve been close to the conversational red zone, but last night was more like the orange zone. We averted disaster with a group hug and some of the best hot wings (BW3 on North High Street) I’ve ever had.
As we drove from Columbus to Bardstown, Kentucky, blood sugar dipped and there was much bitching about driving and overreactions to driving and playing the stereo too loud and nobody able to focus because it was 3pm and we hadn’t had lunch. It doesn’t help that I like to drive a little fast and after living in California, I prefer people around me to do the same. Folks in Ohio aren’t bad drivers, just not fast. They like to take their time changing lanes. Nothing wrong with that, but on an interstate, I like to make time (see Richard E. Grant in Withnail and I).
One of the topics in the car was how I needed to be more involved with the conversation. However, when the conversation sounds like the first 12 minutes of commentary on the unrated DVD of Anchorman, it’s not like we’re working on quantum physics.
The other thing that needs to be said is that I’m travelling with Luddites. I have the ability to attach a GPS unit to my laptop and display our exact location as well as get instantaneous directions to a local address from wherever we happen to be. As we are men, and two-thirds of us fear the evil box with the wire coming out of it, the GPS is only deferred to once the shit has hit the fan. Logic would indicate that we could actually fire up the GPS and type in the address prior to the shit hitting the fan. However, it has saved the day, every day and when it has, thousands of school children sing a glorious stanza to my name and my prowess for pointing and clicking.
More to come… o
July 13th, 2005 at 10:46 pm
No wonder she loves you, wires, stanzas, Anchorman references. Sweet.
Oh yeah, and FIRST!!!!!!
July 13th, 2005 at 11:14 pm
Hey, wow, I’m second, which is a first for me.
That sounds like an endorsment for GPS. Mind Sharing what you’re using, it seems like pretty slim pickings for Mac Compatible GPS/mapping stuff.
July 14th, 2005 at 5:25 am
folks in ohio don’t do ANYTHING fast. hell, we don’t even SPEED fast.
July 14th, 2005 at 6:01 am
bw3 makes the best wings known to man. there’s one in colorado.
July 14th, 2005 at 6:07 am
Forget the GPS, forget the magic of bourbon - get home man, your wife’s on stage making guitar noises.
July 14th, 2005 at 6:32 am
Let us know when the bats descend.
July 14th, 2005 at 6:46 am
When you go to Markers Mark Distillery, buy the chocolate bourbon balls. Oh sweet Jesus, they’re fine. My best friend lives just up the road from the distillery, and I have dipped one too many bottles in that gorgeous red wax. Enjoy!
July 14th, 2005 at 7:10 am
You’re going to love the Maker’s tour. And yes I can’t say enough good things about the Maker’s bourbon balls. If you want to stretch your trip a little bit you can head over to Frankfort and do the Buffalo Trace tour as well. I know you’re a loyal Maker’s guy but the Buffalo Trace ground and distillery are really something.
July 14th, 2005 at 7:26 am
I love the fact you have a GPS and yet they won’t resort to it until you’re lost!! I suppose it makes it all a great adventure though…and with bourbon thrown it, helluva lot of fun!
July 14th, 2005 at 7:27 am
As an official MM Ambassador, I welcome you to the kingdom of bourbon. May your stay be pleasantly hazy.
July 14th, 2005 at 7:54 am
Oh, Withnail & I! Brilliant!
“I FEEL…..LIKE A PIG….SHAT….IN MY HEAD.”
Just beware of Uncle Monty, Jon….
July 14th, 2005 at 7:57 am
“Bourbon Balls” will be stuck in my head all day.
July 14th, 2005 at 8:17 am
I’m glad you’re a patient man, Jon. I think I would have bailed by now. The guys you’re with may be good friends but it sounds like each has his own whiney, high-maintenance streak.
Next time you stop at a grocery store pick up a few Binkys and let them each have one. Maybe then they’ll get the picture.
July 14th, 2005 at 8:18 am
I can impart no wisdom regarding bourbon, nor GPS’s, nor travelling with old friends.
I just wanted to say how much I enjoyed reading this piece, and I’m looking forward to further installments. Have a safe journey.
July 14th, 2005 at 10:09 am
Mmmm…BW3 wings!! What level of hotness did you get? You know that proves (or disproves) your manhood, right?
July 14th, 2005 at 10:48 am
Dudes, Tell me about your sled. Now that you have the band back together, what do you use as the team bus?
July 14th, 2005 at 12:56 pm
Soo jealous! I toured the Jim Beam bourbonery(?) — but I WANT to dip a bottle in that red Wax!!!
July 14th, 2005 at 1:06 pm
“I would love to say that this road trip all began in the Polo Lounge at the Beverly Hills Hotel with a mysterious telex.”
Does that mean there was no ether involved either?
July 14th, 2005 at 1:46 pm
That BW3 is just a few blocks from my house. I live in the historic district just east of there. They have cheap drafts every night of the week AND we can walk/stumble home.
July 14th, 2005 at 4:07 pm
Go to Wings N’ Things on 2nd South. Best wings I’ve ever had.
July 14th, 2005 at 4:31 pm
I wish I would have known you’d be on High Street, as I would have recommended that you visit the greatest, dirtiest, restaurant/bar with the best juke box in Columbus (and possibly all of creation), The Blue Danube, a.k.a. “The Dube.”
July 14th, 2005 at 6:17 pm
Bw3 does, in fact, rock.
July 15th, 2005 at 2:07 pm
Is that you, Senator Hatch? Blood sugar’s a little low today, huh?