Breathing Easier
September 27th, 2005I’m completely floored by the very supportive comments and emails. I can’t possibly respond to all of you, so this is how I’m doing it. I’m feeling pretty buoyed up right now. The last time I worked from home was a disaster that lead to us leaving L.A. We wanted to leave, sort of, and it’s worked out very well. But we’ve got some major work in front of us. I’m looking forward to it, not dreading it. And that’s a big change from a week ago.
I don’t think we could do this without all the very loyal, very wonderful readers and supporters. The ads (I’ll be putting some on this site as well) will give us breathing room to figure it out. And that is a luxury I don’t take for granted. Over the past few years, we’ve been so lucky to have such a fantastic patronage from all of you. Yes, I’m kissing your asses. Hopefully, over the next few months, there will be even more reason to visit, and I’m thinking that if things continue, I might not ever have to get another job. Just make my own. Or make this site my business.
I’ve mentioned Po Bronson and his book What Should I Do With My Life (Fast Company Essay, Amazon, NPR, Personal Site) before. I think I’m experiencing one of the moments that so many people in that book talk about; making real change for the better and being more healthy and happy because of it. If you are looking for your life to take a new direction, the book is not the savior. It’s just got a lot of great stories about people and their dreams.
I still want to design and build things, but I’m going to be more selective and hopefully smarter about who I work with in that part of my professional life. Not being desperate is a good thing, so I think that’s a big part of working with people you want to work with as opposed to taking a job because you have to. I also value my family life. Partly because I never thought I’d have a family. Partly because it’s who I am. I want to be there for Heather and Leta. No amount of money is going to make up for me being gone either mentally or physically. Because I can do this right now, I am. I can. Thank you so much Heather.
I’ve always loved publishing and writing, but I’ve only put “writer” on my resume once, and subsequently took it off, because I felt a fraud. I think it’s time for me to embrace the publishing/writing side of myself and hopefully results will be seen here and other places.
Finally, I think it’s awful that so many people are in such bad places professionally. I’m so sorry that so many of you are living and working in hell. May we all escape the hell. o
September 27th, 2005 at 2:53 pm
I think you made a wonderful choice! Family is more important than any amount of $$$! Good luck to you! I am a long time reader of Heathers site and yours and think that you two are top notch people!!
September 27th, 2005 at 2:57 pm
I’m so happy for you and the new direction that you are headed. Thanks for the book reference. I’ll check it out. I literally have 16 hours left to work at a job that I quit due to the shit and ethic bi-polar, abusive treatment of the employees who I was hired to take care of - the owner wouldn’t let me do it. I quit.
I’m stressed about the “jobless” state but am confident that you can’t go wrong making the making the right decision. At the end of the day you look in the mirror, or your the face of your wife, or the eyes of your kids - integrity is all you have.
Be well.
WH
September 27th, 2005 at 3:07 pm
I’m really at a good place to work right now - yes, it’s insanely busy in the fall and somewhat in the spring, but as long as the work gets done I can make my own hours. I’ve been where you’re at and where others have gone before and have just said “I QUIT” and got the hell out of Dodge. It’s a wonderfully refreshing feeling - once you get over the “OMG what have I just done?” feeling.
Life’s TOO short. Enjoy. Good luck to you and Heather (oh, yes, Leta too).
September 27th, 2005 at 3:12 pm
I’ve had that damn book on my shelf for about a year! It scares me to be honest, so kudos to you for taking the decision. Ohh that my wife didn’t mind talking about poo and stuff on her blog (if she had a blog at all)…
All the best for whatever you decide. Best of luck to you.
September 27th, 2005 at 3:15 pm
you’ve shown you’re a writer by the amount of work you put into your entries on this site, jon. you are a writer. i hope you enjoy it as much as i do. and as heather apparently does.
September 27th, 2005 at 3:19 pm
I’m a former Housing Manager and let me tell you they’re probably as hated as insurance salesman, colletion and IRS agents and lawyers. I was burnt out and my cynicism was getting the best of me so I quit my management position and went back to school. I’m 42. It’s never too late to follow your dreams or learn something new. As long as you have a pulse and inner drive, you’re good to go.
September 27th, 2005 at 3:40 pm
I like your writing style. It’s simple and seems effortless, not cluttered.
The book is cool, but you’re right about it not being a savior. I think you’ll only relate to it when you’re ready (or already starting) to make major life changes.
Good luck.
September 27th, 2005 at 3:49 pm
John,
I have been reading both of yours and Heather’s blogs for a few months, and I wish you the best! (Very Seinfeld, and Fun)!!! I recently picked up a book that would be filed away in the “religion” section, but it’s actually more of a book for the individual.. take it and make it your own kinda thing. It’s by Joel Osteen, called something to the effect of “How to live your best life”. It’s just written in the perspective of opening your eyes to the endless possibilities that there are for all of us. Best Luck on your Journey!
September 27th, 2005 at 3:51 pm
I have a job that I dislike greatly and have been going through the same thoughts you must have been having. Giving up the security of my full-time job scares me being only 24 and not having finished school yet. I have considered taking a chance and getting out and doing something I enjoy. Thank you for the inspiration to realize that we should be able to have jobs we enjoy and have the strength to follow our dreams! Thanks!
September 27th, 2005 at 3:57 pm
Good for you. Be patient. Momement by moment and step by step is how we can create change in our lives. I have had the WORST jobs where I thought I would actually die if i didn’t get out. I didn’t die and I got out. I think responsability to the family is more than just holding down a job, it is being able to be a nice person when you have time to spend with them. Bad jobs make good people mean.
Good luck, kid. You’ll do great!
September 27th, 2005 at 3:57 pm
Really, congratulations. Two questions. One, when you said she threw the pages “on the floor,” did you literally mean “on the floor”? She took work you did and dropped it on the ground? On purpose? Wha…? I guess my second question — about whether this means you’re going to have a bit more time for this site — has been answered. My response: yay! I’m glad for you guys.
September 27th, 2005 at 4:03 pm
Laziza, yes. My printouts were thrown on the floor. Literally. The floor. On purpose.
September 27th, 2005 at 4:04 pm
Sounds like you made the right decision, one that will be perfect for all of you - that is if you do it Heather’s way
I too, made the same decision as you back in late 2002 when my daughther was born and I now run my own company and I have never been happier! Good for you, run with it and enjoy!
September 27th, 2005 at 4:46 pm
A follow-up, then: And it took you this long to quit? You, sir, are a saint. My congratulations suddenly just became much heartier.
September 27th, 2005 at 4:46 pm
Yay! You already sound 100x more relaxed. Yeah, you’ve got a big hill to climb, but won’t it be beautiful to do it without sixteen monkeys in a backpack, clawing at your eyes & flinging their feces everywhere? When you leave a toxic job, especially one you’ve lived with for a long time, I think it’s very similar to leaving an abusive relationship. You have anger, fear, bile, rage, terror and the noticeable space where that job(abuser) used to be and you wonder if life will ever be the same. And the good news is? It won’t. I gave myself a month for every year I was at the last place & warned my husband, “I was there for almost six years, I get six months to be pissed-off angry.” In the first month, I thought I’d been optimistic & would need more time. But it sheds like molting, or a snake’s skin. Yeah, I hear stuff & I still get mad, because I believe in Justice and Right and Wrong, but I also know the most core of all truths: I will Never. Ever. go through that kind of shit again. You won’t either. Bravissima, and here’s to everyone who has to cope with bullshit manager monkeys. I tilt a glass of Patron at all of you. Someday, there just might be a revolution…. and the monkeys all get thrown into the zoo….
September 27th, 2005 at 5:30 pm
I have been a reader of both your blog and Heather’s for a year now, although I don’t think I have ever posted.
Just wanted to say GOOD FOR YOU for being able to stop the professional insanity (and props for being able to survive from your websites!!) and embark on a path that will make you happy.
I’m currently a cubeland drone, but hope to move on very soon. You are inspiring. Both of you. In so many ways.
Thanks for writing and thanks for being so real. It is refreshing!!
September 27th, 2005 at 5:44 pm
Rarely am I ever this effusive, but I think you and Heather are a great example of people who love and respect each other, work hard for and with one another, and know that it’s never as easy as it looks on the Internet.
No wonder we’re all rooting for you.
September 27th, 2005 at 5:55 pm
I am the internet Heather talks about. You and she tell me things but I have never said responded. But I feel compelled to do this little thing which is thanking you both for sharing your lives and what you are about to me (and everyone else). I don’t want to repeat what others have said more eloquently than me so I will just leave it at good luck and THANKS!
September 27th, 2005 at 6:09 pm
You & Heather an inspiration to me. I’m working a job I hate (but am good at) so that my partner can do what he loves. We’re going to switch soon & seeing that other people out there do that means a lot. Good luck to you & yours.
September 27th, 2005 at 6:15 pm
the only thing better than getting a job is quitting one. best of luck to yall!
September 27th, 2005 at 6:34 pm
Amen.
Good luck!
I’m glad you’ve got the chance to do some exploring - and I hope your endeavours take you to the niche that’s waiting for you.
September 27th, 2005 at 6:44 pm
Jon,
Again I am so happy for you. I find it to be so inspirational to hear about people who have found happiness in their daily jobs. Good for you. I wish you and Heather so many blessings and as I said before I believe when you live your true life you will be completly taken care of. I believe that for you and Heather. Good luck.
September 27th, 2005 at 8:13 pm
Dude, if Leta is channeling the Flying Spaghetti Monster, you are going to make it big in Utah. I hear they like their Prophets to keep it real.
If not, you and Heather have something great, Keep that real and you’re on the right track.
September 27th, 2005 at 9:01 pm
Hey Jon, speaking of hosting stuff on your site. You should try to sell some of yall’s beautiful photography. You both really have an eye and a gift for capturing breathtaking shots. Keep following your heart, I know that sound cheesy as hell, but I think thats why you guys are so good together, because you seem to always do what you know in your soul is right for your family. More men should take a lesson and realize that’s what being a real man is all about. I am lucky that way, as is Heather. Take care
September 27th, 2005 at 9:04 pm
BTW, sounds like your boss was a total cunt rag. Can I say that on the internet? hehe