The Rat
October 4th, 2005
This toy rat is the one that Heather has tried countless times to scare me with post-tarantula. I’ve never screamed loud enough or stuck my chin out far enough to warrant a genuine scare.
Leta, on the other hand, after an initially rocky start, pulling one of the cutest ewwww! faces, now takes this by the tail and shakes it up and down, yo-yo like.
I’m convinced that in three days, I could hide this in a drawer or under a pillow and Heather would still shriek loud enough to crack the plaster walls.
I don’t think this would be a photo that I would sell, for the record. MP3s of the shrieking, maybe a whole CD worth? That would be pure gold. o
October 5th, 2005 at 3:55 pm
I think he’s cute. But my cats would ignore it. No squeaks, no movement. Nothing for them to chase or stalk.
October 5th, 2005 at 4:58 pm
My significant other is terrified of spiders. T-E-R-R-I-F-E-D!!! And he is 6′4″ and probably over 300 lbs, so it’s a sight seeing him scream like a girl and shrink away from a spider in the house. ANY spider, the tiny wispy legged ones, the big ugly black house spiders, daddy long legs…ANY spider. I am confident that if I did the “plastic spider in the cereal box trick” he would either have a heart attack or leave me on the spot. So none of that in my house!
October 5th, 2005 at 7:17 pm
It’s so pretty. Reminds me of morning dew.
The plague’s a close second though.
October 5th, 2005 at 7:41 pm
I really miss the blurbomat whores. Can you bring them back, at least monthly? Please?
October 5th, 2005 at 9:59 pm
I’ve always been terrified of spiders so when I saw the gargantuen wolf spider one day in my house, I daresay, I peed myself. The body (not incl legs) had to be at least 3 or 4 inches wide then add those big ass legs and you have a puddle of pee standing there screaming like a baby. Throw me in a room with spiders and clowns somewhere way up high and I guarantee a heart attack and urination.
October 5th, 2005 at 10:48 pm
My oldest son and I have a wicked game every year of “What can Mom freak me out with this time?” that’s guaranteed to make any child squirm… Last year, I found this rubber chicken that was fulled with those small styrofoam pellets, and this, and it’s cool rubber outside made it’s texture kind of….icky. I shoved it all the way down in the toe of his Christmas stocking, and when my sleepy Eldest Son was pulling it out, early that morning, the weird texture didn’t kick in until it was halfway out… He yelled EUW and threw it, and the facial expression was something that made me laugh until I cried…
Being evil can be fun.
You, however, and not going to get any for quite a long time!
October 6th, 2005 at 3:13 am
CD? I’d say a DVD, and make them videos, not photos! With eBay, you might even be able to sell them!
First time leaving a post here, but have read both yours and your wife’s sites. I hope I will be making my own job transition very very soon. Nice to see people taking up the courage to walk away. Cos it takes much more to leave, than stay put.
Kostas.
October 6th, 2005 at 7:50 am
Trishfreak, I’m scared of spiders and clowns too! We were just discussing this(phobias) in my abnormal psychology class.
October 6th, 2005 at 8:42 am
I put a toy rat like that in front of my cat. She instantly thought it was the real thing. She arched her back, hissed, grabbed by the neck, and threw it 20 feet across the room and against the wall. She then sniffed it and walked away very very embarassed. Not that she would ever admit it…
October 6th, 2005 at 10:04 am
The rubber rat wouldn’t scare me, not even a real one. Or mice for that matter. But when my ‘darling’ little cat brought in a disembowelled mouse and somehow hid it under the sofa, where it wasn’t discovered until the next day when it smelled horrendous and had went all sticky - now that made me scream. And made me tell my fiance to pick it up
October 6th, 2005 at 10:25 am
Disembowelled mouse under the couch? That’s nothing on the gross scale compared to this… How about having your dog eat a bunch of baby gophers during a long off leash walk and then puke them up later…. NOW THAT’S NASTY!!!
October 6th, 2005 at 11:13 am
A few years ago an NPR story included an interview with the owner of a novelty gifts store. He was talking about a small plastic rat for $1.25, and a large rat for $2.50. At that, the interviewer noted that by purchasing the large item, you’d get “a buck twenty five more rat.” I always thought that would make a great band name.
October 6th, 2005 at 11:49 am
Just wanted to throw in here that the picture of you with Leta on your back (dooce’s pic of the day, 10/6/05) makes you look like a rather dashing, rugged, outdoorsy type.
That’s a helluva camera, I guess.
October 6th, 2005 at 1:10 pm
Great shot!
october is the best month ever,scaring people is fun.
October 6th, 2005 at 3:05 pm
looks like rat licorice! yum!
October 7th, 2005 at 12:40 am
My professor told a story about when he bought his first house. He thought they had rats so he set rat traps and poison, and one day he was cleaning the ceiling and one of the tiles came loose, showering him in rat crap, and right in front of him fell two dead rats: one rat with its neck crushed in the rat trap, and the another rat, who was apparently high from the poison, with his teeth sunk into the first rat’s side.
That made me squirm.
October 10th, 2005 at 2:42 pm
After hiking in Hawaii, I was unbraiding my hair in the shower and found a 4 inch real live gecko chilling out in my hair. That proceeded to run down my naked-in-shower arm, and out of the tub.
My husband still finds this story hysterical.
October 12th, 2005 at 10:51 am
The best scare my family has come across is the Toilet Swamp Monster (or something along those lines) - it’s the top hald of a rubber monster, and you suction it’s neck/torso to the underside of the toilet seat, and the hands to the toilet cover, so that it leaps up and makes a scary face when someone liftes the lid.
October 12th, 2005 at 10:57 am
OMG! That is HILARIOUS! We recently had a rat problem in the house which turned into my husband & I coming across a fake black rat and hiding it back and forth trying to scare each other. Last night I went to the fridge and screamed when I saw a grey rat sitting by the fridge. He bought a new grey rat (halloween time and all) on the way home from work and hid it because he knew I was getting *used to* the black rat showing up. LOL! Glad we’re not the only couple that does this. haha!
October 12th, 2005 at 3:29 pm
Many years ago, my ex-wife and I had a similar game involving a small plastic spider. I hid it under the soap in the soap dish in the shower ñ she shrieked. She hid it in my notesÖ. EtcÖ etcÖ.etcÖ.
When I was a younger man ñ I used to wear ìbriefsî, not boxers. ìShe who is evilî decided that it would be funny to hide said spider in my ìtighty ñ whitiesî while they were neatly folded in my drawer.
So, it was much to my surprise, when one morning at work during a mid morning coffee break I went to the urinal and unzipped, only to see a SPIDER fall out on the floor!
Try explaining that one to the guy standing next to you.
October 13th, 2005 at 1:34 pm
HA! Lame rat tricks! Try having your husband stand in the closet doorway - which is right next to the bathroom door- and when you come out of the bathroom - at 2am when mind you he was asleep when you went to the bathroom- he sneaks out after you turn off the light and simply says “boo” - he didn’t even yell it- but thats ok cause i screamed for like 30 seconds straight and fell down on the floor which I am sure was not that good for our unborn child- I am sure that is now why said child is a monster!
October 13th, 2005 at 4:26 pm
HAh. My 5-yr old did the same thing to his dad. We got a couple of dollar rubber spiders in Target the other day, we put it under the cover of my husband’s side. He shrinked like a little girl. HAHAHA…It was a beautiful sight, and sound.
October 14th, 2005 at 7:41 am
hey that sounds very familiar
i used to do that once, you know. this scaring thing is real cute and works with kids
October 18th, 2005 at 6:21 am
Some friends of mine and I take this one step further — they’ve got one of those rubber decapitated arms, and we used to do things like put it, with a sleeve on it, so it looked like someone was climbing into my bathroom window, or put it, fingers out, like someone was trying to climb out of the toilet!
Then I upped the ante: I bought one of those rubber full-head masks of this crazy scary looking guy, stuffed it with newspaper, and left it in the trunk of their car!
I’ve been watching too many episodes of The Sopranos back to back!
October 19th, 2005 at 6:10 pm
I had a co-worker that was wrapped too tight for earth. She had her ID badge with all the ëI been here 25 years pins on ití. I stole her badge and after she spent a week getting new pins and pictures I stole her new one and put the old one back. She took 3 days off. I still smile thinking about it.