To the Internet: Chill

I know the New Year’s resolutions aren’t working out and we all spent too much on the holidays. So what’s the obsession with my baby girl and how she sits in her carseat? There’s a lot of other things going on in the world today, so Internet, what gives?

Leta is nearly a year old. She’s tall for her age and will not fit comfortably in ANY publicly available carset that faces the rear of the vehicle. We decided that because of her height AND weight, it’s fine for her to ride facing forward. She’s not near an airbag, and our vehicle has the LATCH system, which is recommended by everybody.

Every time we buckle her in, I check the LATCH belts and she is always secured at three points (two bottom, one tether on the top). The straps are taut. She’s buckled in as recommended and her safety is important to us. Most of the time, anyway. When we’re not doing stuff like this:

(sometimes I sign autographs “Joe”)

We had a pretty crazy scene here yesterday. I was driving out west of town with Leta facing forward in her carseat and the cops got involved:

I think they saw Leta facing forward in her carseat because they were driving like crazy:

But when the dust settled the cops just said that I looked kind of like the guy on the left:

Who, as luck would have it, has a sweet bobble head doll of his likeness on sale now.

Moral of the story: Car jumps with flames are sweet.

  • Irma

    Seriously, if you’re doing that with the car she’d be better off facing the rear. Whiplash and all you know. You’re terrible terrible parents for getting involved in car chases with a child facing the wrong way. I mean OMG WTF!!!111

    In case anyone’s blood starts boiling: 😉

  • seannarae

    dood jon fuck them. fuck them in the ear.

    but then – you KNEW this.

    if there’s one thing that Jude has taught me straight up, is that the world is fulla critics. armchair parents. and while i am far from a religious man, i am sure of one thing: there is not one mortal soul amongst us that has their shit together well enough to critique another.

    its all relative. you and H are doing fine. you’re just a tad, um… exposed, i suppose, given how much you share, how much you both GIVE.

    and thats where my hats off to you two. not only are you two just exiting your first of many years in your recent roles as parents, but you’ve chosen to do so in such a way that has included us. The royal ‘US’. Any commenters hitherto’ll agree.

    thank you. thank you both for allowing my clan alexander the privledge of reading both yours and heathers posts and being reminded that this… right now… this is a wonderful time to be alive.

    ok. cork the fuggin wine, sean. now.

    happy (upcoming) birthday Leta. tell your old man not to delete this post. it didnt suck *too* much.

  • Ayse

    You guys are very generous to even consider responding to the sort of idiots who would bitch at you about how your daughter sits in a car seat. I mean, seriously. They’re just some random dorks off the internet, and what the hell do they know? If they gave you stock advice, would you take it? Probably not. So why even consider taking their advice about your CHILD?

    Also: more pics of car jumps with flames, please. Those ARE excellent.

  • Lionfire

    You’re not doing it properly if the back seat’s facing forwards. You need to have it facing backw… wait… you’re not in the back seat?

    Honestly, how can you even begin to call yourself a professional stunt driver?

    (of course, the real test would be to let Leta do the driving)

  • Beth

    You’re gonna crash the General Lee at this rate!

    But seriously – wtf? I don’t get people. I’m continually amazed at their balls and stupidity.

  • Kev

    You should always let the kids drive, eveyone knows that.
    She’s almost a year old, she should be driving to the shops and buying you beer by now …

  • Jenna

    Best. Moral. Evar.

  • B

    The General Lee is a definite step up from the XTerra or the Civic. No more explaining why you are driving a car registered in someone elses name with expired tags, hell, they won’t even get a change to see your tags now.

  • Kris

    Do you actually listen to the internet? I mean, seriously, you are lucky she *sits* in the car seat. My son used to wiggle out no matter how tight I buckled him in. At 9 months, he’d have his arms out and I just knew I was going to drive by a cop at that time. Both you and Heather are extremely good parents. Believe me, Leta will appreciate your humor and fun-loving natures when she gets older. In the meantime, ignore all of us (well, except me).

  • peach_linen

    Heh! Long-time Dooce reader here who’s ventured to Blurbomat a few times. When I saw the pic of Leta in her car seat, I chuckled. I, too, was impressed that you can get someone that squirming and all “Gimme!” into a car seat period! Then I thought, dude, I don’t know about Utah, but in Indiana, she’ll have to be in some sort of car/booster seat until she’s SEVEN YEARS OLD. Period! We apparently don’t go by hieght or weight, it’s by age.

    Can you imagine trying to buckle her into any type of seat when she’s SEVEN! Heh!!!!

  • http://none GreenOceanBear

    You two spend FAR too much time being overly defensive about your kid to random internet wackos. If you choose to post so much about your lives to the internet, you have to know you’re going to get critics. I’m surprised you don’t have more – not bc I think you deserve it but bc that’s just how people are. My advice: GET OVER IT. The time you spend whining about it is ridiculous. How do you go through life being this sensitive?!

  • Lisa

    I work for a pretty big manufacturer of carseats. My job is to be on the phone and take calls from consumers with our carseats. One of the top questions I get is whether or not it is ok to forward face a child that is under one year. Technically, we recommend a child to face the rear of the vehicle until the child is one year old. This is because the child’s neck muscles are not fully developed until they are a year old. In the event of a crash the impact can cause too much strain on the child’s neck. But as I tell my consumers, if your pediatrician says it’s ok to forward face your child before the year is up, it’s ultimately your decision. All children develop at a different rate and only you, and your pediatrician, can judge the progress of your own child.

    Also, here in the state of Indiana, currently the law is 4 years old and 40 pounds. After June 1, it will be 8 years old and 80 pounds.

  • jado

    Looks like them Armstrong boys are at it again.

    Boss Hogg ain’t gonna like Leta facing forward.

  • Nobody

    The car seat is fine, but where is her flame-retardant jump suit?

  • cursingmama

    WTF is wrong with people? Love the response, although I have to admit I was always a little weak in the knees over the one on the right.

  • ms mincemeat

    ..But car jumps with flames AND BABIES are sweeter…

  • caryn

    hmmm…. my son is forward facing in the EXACT SAME carseat.

  • amber

    You two are so much better at responding to idiots than I am… I’m not worthy. :)

  • haplys

    What model carseat does Leta use? My twins are starting to outgrow their infant seats and it’s time to switch to a convertible one. I’m pretty sure you’ve probably done more research on them than any parent in the country so maybe I can just copy you. :)

  • Mary

    All I have to say is that Leta is so lucky to have parents that will let her come along for rides like that. When I was a kid, I didn’t get to do anything involving car chases. I feel deprived. Yet another childhood disappointment to discuss with my therapist…

  • brandon

    Just saying ‘chill’ won’t work i’m afraid. Remember when Bo and Luke got into fisticuffs? Daisy was crying? Uncle Jesse had to let off a couple of blasts with his shotgun in order to make it stop, make it stop.

    You’re going to have to start shooting people, my friend. Thems the rules in Hazzard County.

  • Hope

    While I have time to lurk and sometimes even de-lurk, I don’t have time to criticize how someone straps their kind into the car seat.

    My life may be fairly mundane, but christ, if that’s a top priority for your day, those are some sorry ass people.

  • becky

    you just proved once again why you rule. i LOVED the dukes of hazzard. we even played them on the 1/2 hr bus ride to school. my cousin & i made her sister be daisy & she hated it because daisy didn’t get to drive the general. *grin*

    you’re much nicer about telling people to lay off than i am. i would’ve already told greenoceanbear to suck it.

  • jeff

    i remember the days when all three of us kids would sleep in sleeping bags in the back of the station wagon on family road trips. seat belts? we don’t need no stinking seat belts!

    i mean, crap, i made it through years of rolling around, untethered in the back of that behemoth and i’m still here to type. people tend to forget recent history and that car seats are a recent invention. most of those being critical probably never rode in one either, so tell ’em to stuff it in their ear.

  • Eva

    Rear-facing carseats weren’t even invented until the mid-80s, so it’s, like, a Miracle so many of us survived all those bootlegging runs we made with our moonshiner parents. I remember one time my dad took me and my baby sister with him on a delivery–hoo boy that was a wild night! Uncle Jessy called us on the CB radio and told us to watch out because Roscoe was setting a trap for us up ahead. We took a detour on Old Henhouse Rd and ended up having to jump Slappy’s Gorge, because the bridge was out. Enos had gotten wind of our detour and was chasing us, but for some reason his car couldn’t make the jump and he ended up in the river. If my sister had been in a rear facing car seat, not only would her neck have been better protected, but the poor little thing also wouldn’t have had to twist around in her car seat to give old Enos the finger as we drove away, laughing and whooping, toward our rendezvous with the buyers.

    Jon, I hope you keep on fightin the sytem like a true modern day Robin Hood.

  • cw

    You jumped all the way back to 1977? Very cool, Joe.

  • Terri

    When I first saw the picture of Leta facing forward, I cringed. Not because she was facing forward, but because I knew you and Heather were in for a load of crap emails. Everyone’s right, fuck the haters. You guys are doing great.

  • Angie

    All I can say is…I want a Luke Duke bobblehead!!

  • e

    I cannot believe that anyone (even the mindless idiots on the interweb) would think for even a second that you or Heather would even CONSIDER doing something that would be dangerous to Leta – some people need a good smack upside the head :-)

  • maria

    I live in Mexico, and truly, if it was so terrible, all mexican children would be dead, I’m one of the five people who use a carseat. Seriously, you are great parents.

  • Kim

    Thus Spake GreenOceanBear: “The time you spend whining about it is ridiculous. How do you go through life being this sensitive?!”

    GreenOceanBear: let me get this straight — your method of advising someone to be less sensitive is…giving them a lengthy lecture in which you call them “ridiculous”? How do YOU go through life being this abrasive?!

  • WindyLou

    Bo Duke and Luke Duke. Damn they were hot. I lusted after the Dukes of Hazzard before I ever knew what lust was. Thanks for the reminder.

    I bet if you get Leta an Evil Kinevil Helmet, people will stop complaining about the carseat deal.

  • Lucky

    She should be in the middle it’s the safest place for a child. And I’m sorry but she’s not ready to be facing forward, they make seats for bigger children that face backwards. You also should have her in the middle it’s the safest place, that’s where her rear-facing seat should have been too. My sister is a pediatrician, so I know that there’s not a doctor who’d tell you it was okayÖat least not any good ones I know.

    I have to agree with the other poster. Don’t air your dirty laundry and your life, if you’re going to get your panties in a wad. Keep a part of your life private and you won’t have this problem. The Internet allows people to say things they wouldn’t in person. As a mother, I would notice your little baby in the side seat and because I care I would tell you about larger car seats for big babies, I would tell you she should be in the middle. And then if you didn’t listen to me, I’d tell you about the baby that I had take out of a car seat about 4 years ago with a broken neck, that was in a front facing car seat at 10 months. I’m an EMT registered and by law until my license expires next month I must stop for all accidents. This is one accident’ I didn’t want to be involved with. I’ll never forget that one till the day I die. If Leta cries, so be it, it’s all part of raising a child, they don’t like car seats.

    I also have a sister who is almost exactly similar to Leta in her developments. Melissa did walk eventually @ 1-year.4 months but she was forever in special Ed classes all her childhood. It wasn’t just her body she was delayed on things that we were doing at 4-6 months, waving goodbye, talking etc that she didn’t get till much later. She’s married now, and has 4 children, but life has been difficult for her and her body now has developed Rheumatoid Arthritis at 34. She had my parents and family to help, it helped some but the hard work she had to do by herself. We shelled out $$$$ of dollars and this was in the 70, and 80 to put her in special schools that would help her do better in school and learn good social skills. She’s not retarded by any means she’s just emotionally behind and was always will be behind everyone else. I’d get a second, and third opinion on Leta, and then find some support groups.

    I wish you luck.

  • jenny

    tears in the eyes from laughing, that’s all I can say.

  • Sarah

    Are you SURE you’re not out on the roads driving like that? I thought it was you that I saw doing doughnuts on the interstate when I was on my way to the grocery store! Ha, ha.

    Anyway, sorry to hear that people are still putting their noses in it.

  • Dave Thomas


    It takes a lot to drag me out of my cellar, but you have just erected a monument of nitwittedness and I feel I should salute.

    I will grant you that your advice on car seats, however inexplicable the urge to offer it here and now, is driven by good intentions. You truly don’t like the idea of breaknecked babies. I can dig that. They bug me, too.

    But talk to me about your last paragraph. Before you do, though, let me tell you about a friend I have who is also named “Lucky,” who was almost exactly similar to you in her writing of pointless, specifically not-asked-for doomsaying. She got hit by a tub of mayonnaise that somebody dropped from a zeppelin and then fell into a shark’s mouth and died. But at least she’s not retarded by any means. Just dead. I’d get a second, and third opinion on your postings, and then find some support groups.

    Oh, and I also wish you luck, “Lucky.”

  • veg4me

    Yeah, babies should be in the middle but what about when you have two kids back there or an adult sitting next to the carseat. The middle isn’t always a viable option….just like knowing when to keep your opinions to yourself.

  • Gretchen C.

    Oh, I’m all for her facing forward. Gives her more room to hold her martini and play with the knives and razor blades you and Heather are always handing to her.

    People who criticize people obviously don’t have anything going on in their own lives.

  • bill

    HA! Ok thanks for cracking my shit up!

    Screw’em! It’s your child and you and H are taking wonderful care of her.

  • Mari

    Lucky –
    Maybe you meant well by your ancedotal story about your sister, but I don’t see how it has any relevance to Leta. In fact, I think it’s rather insensitive to tell such a doomsday story and imply that you see the same symptoms as Leta. Are you a pediatrician? I also doubt that unless your sister had RA as a child, her slow development as a child had anything to do with developing rheumatoid arthritis in her adult years. My sister has a lupus, another autoimmune disorder, which was diagnosed at age 24, and she showed no signs of anything being wrong as a child.

    From their posts, Jon and Heather have made sure that Leta has received excellent medical care. Primary Children’s hospital is one of the best childrens’ hospitals in the country. Leta is also receiving PT. I think we can all rest assured that she is being well taken care of.

    Don’t you have things to worry about in your own life?

  • Emily Petrick


    Damn. those crazy Dukes.

  • veg4me

    I forgot to say- I was diagnosed with Lupus 10 years ago. I’m an only child. You better have another child or Leta is going to get Lupus since she is an only child. Holy crap! I’m 6 ft tall. Leta is tall. Will the similarities never cease?

  • alice

    Your response is capital A-awesome!!

    Once Luke Duke flew over a fence and landed on his ass, the rest of the gang ran over and asked if he was hurt and he responded
    “The only thing hurt is my pride”
    and for the longest time I thought pride was another word for ass.

    PS. you should start training Leta to box now, shes got some mitts on her! Super cutie!

  • peach_linen


    Thanks for that Indiana info. I don’t have kids, but a friend of mine was worried about that law and she swore there wasn’t a weight limit issued (because I figured that was what they’d have to do, really, because some small kids stay small and whatever). Good to have that link!!

  • Almost Lucid (Brad)

    We faced our girl forward at the 11 month point. She weighed 20 pounds, had strength in her neck, etc… You’re a damn good Dad, and you know what? You’re Leta’s only dad, and that makes you the king of the world to her. So do whatever you damn well please. We know you’ll always do it with love for her.

  • Zach

    Lucky, eat it.

  • Marla

    So funny. I almost peed my pants thinking of Leta in that car.

  • kalisah

    I get the weirdest feeling that the 3-year-old in the rear-facing carseat (in the link from Car Seat Nazi’s comment that started all this) is still breastfeeding, too.

    And, umm, Lucky? “Don’t air your dirty laundry and your life, if you’re going to get your panties in a wad. Keep a part of your life private and you won’t have this problem.”?

    How exactly is posting a photo of their child riding in a car airing dirty laundry? Not that anything else you said makes any sense either.

  • byrneout

    haplys, when my little Too-Tall Jones outgrew his infant car seat, we went with the Britax Wizard convertible seat. It’s a crapload of money, but it’s rated rear-facing from 5 to 33 pounds and forward from 20 to 65 pounds, so we should be able to have it for some time. I’m worried that he’ll be too tall before we hit the magical year-old mark, but I’m in denial about it for now.

    Lucky, can the hysteria. Your sister’s experience is your sister’s experience. It can’t be used to predict Leta’s or anyone else’s future. And that’s as politely as I can put it.

  • Porter Casey

    Good grief Lucky. Get a grip. I’m adding you to my ignore list.

  • haplys

    byrneout, thanks. i’m probably going to go with the britax. it’s super expensive, and i do have to buy two, but when i consider the amount of money i spend on magazines and diet soda for myself, i can’t really justify not buying the toppest notch. :)

  • Zach

    $250 DOLLARS FOR A CAR SEAT!! Thesus Chrith that’s expensive.

    I’m so glad my dog does not require a car seat because for 250 bucks I don’t give a shit if he’s facing forwards, backwards, up my ass, what have you.

  • jade75

    I didn’t even notice that she was forward facing before she was 1-year-old (I’ve got 3 kids). I just noticed it was a cute picture. It is only a week before her birthday, so I’m thinking you’re in the clear, LOL.

    Love the one where she’s sleeping!

  • Ariel

    Suggestion: I’m betting that switching your and Heather’s comments to “typekey-only” security would minimize the “YOU PEOPLE ARE CHILD ABUSERS!” comments.

    …Then again, crazy people can always email. But most crazies just want attention, and making it a step harder for them to post craziness publicly adds a layer of protection from their madness.

  • Melissa

    Holy crap. I just looked at that link from the other day by the Car Seat Nazi because Kalisah mentioned. How can that kid be “happily” doing anything with his knees stuck to his chin?

    And, I’m pretty sure Lucky’s comment sucks. So, proceed with the deleting.

  • nick

    I believe the proper protocol in this situation, with an infant under the age of 1 (or 20 pounds) is to insert them into their seat through the open window.

    And if she’s not facing forward, how the heck is she supposed to know when you’re hitting some sick hay-bale/broken bridge/triangle car in front of you jump so she can yell “YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWW!!”

    think you internet tards. geez.
    (tho I guess if she were rear facing she could tell you how close Enos & Boss Hog were…I better turn by 3 year old rear facing again!)

  • Sammi

    Great Entry! It made me laugh. Love the photos.

    I agree…delete Lucky.

  • nick

    what I meant to say is:
    Lucky’s right.
    My 3 year old and my 9 month old are both rear facing – when I put them in trunk of the wagon!

    Relax, I tell them to “hang on” when I 2-wheel or drift the corners. Man – ya’all are “all up ons”! 😉

  • becky

    i don’t think it was lucky’s sister that was “behind emotionally” or “retarded.” and i think lucky forgot to read the disclaimer about comments:


  • fish

    You’ve now perfected the art-form of goofy blog posts. Thank you. That picture of the car flying through the air with the red arrow that says “Leta?” I think I saw the face of GOD I laughed so hard.

  • becky

    sorry, jon. couldn’t resist.

    anyone that uses the dukes in a post, well, i just felt the need to get your back. you know how it is.


  • igner

    clearly you are all negligent parents.

    this – – is the only solution.

  • Carolyn J.

    I’m imagining Blurb & Dooce in 5-point seat belts and rally helmets with stars & stripes on them.

  • Kimberly

    Lucky, give it a rest already. So your sister’s a pediatrician, which gives you the right to give advice? My husband’s a pharmacist…but that doesn’t mean I go out telling people how to take their medicine and what doesn’t mix with what.

    Understand that most parents do what they think is best for their kid, no matter what random mother on the street tells them.

    “And if you didn’t listen…I’d tell you about …” Ugh, ugh, ugh! If someone doesn’t listen to your unsolicited advice, it MEANS something. It means “shut up!”

    By the way, I’m glad your EMT license is expiring. I don’t even want to think of you at the scene of an accident I’m in. “If you only peed before you left…blah blah blah.”

    Jon, keep on keepin’ on.

  • http://none Not so lucky

    mayonnaise … zeppelin … shark’s mouth


    Lucky, mind your own damn business. Jon and Heather, you rock!

  • Mike

    I can’t decide who is better at pulling the puppet strings. Jon or Lucky.

  • Marcie

    I think Mike might be on to something.

  • Lisa

    umm… I think Lucky was joking y’all.

  • Lisa

    oops, didn’t see Mike’s post re: puppet strings.

    I concur!

  • dj blurb

    It better be me who is better with the puppetry. This site is nothing without it’s puppetry.

  • Elizabeth

    This is one of the funniest posts I have ever read. I agree with Nick – YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWW!!

  • Coelecanth

    String ’em all up, I says.

  • Torrie

    Lucky, if you don’t like what you see/read here, GO SOMEPLACE ELSE. Jon and Heather have gotten some of us through a lot of tough days with their honesty and humor. It’s hard enough raising a child – they don’t need you lecturing them. A lot of children walk late these days because they sleep on their backs instead of their stomaches. How dare you compare Leta to your sister, you’ve never interacted with her. From my point of view a child who can sit up by herself, wave bye-bye, work the remote control, and interact with other children and adults is doing just fine. But, hey what do I know? I’m not a know it all, can’t keep my negative opinion to myself fucker like you!

  • Cindy

    Don’t tell anyone, but we switched Rachel to forward facing when she was 7 months old.

  • Kath

    Hey Jon!

    Am totally loving the Flickr pix you take with your phone. Was wondering if you or any of your friends have used the SHARP TM 150? I read some reviews online and it sounds killer…just wondering if you have any Blurbomat fyi’s on the Sharp?

    Thanks much –

    Kath :-)

  • Mike

    This site is pure evil with all of its puppetry. I hope you choke on one of your cackles tonight.

  • maria

    I read Lucky’s post and I gotta say, MY sister -as long as we are discussing adults and airing laundry for absolutely no good reason- seemed like the most brilliant child on earth and now she’s an adult and utterly unhappy, apparenly she feels it is her god-given right to give unwanted advice and is now rejected from all social circles. So watch out for that one!

  • TC

    What’s Cooter got to say about all this?

  • Janet

    I think it’s a shame that Lucky’s family spent all their money putting her in “special schools” to help her “learn good social skills” when it seems evident Lucky could have used the same help. Opinions that are not solicited are not usually welcome. Venting about one’s life is not the same as seeking an opinion. Best piece of advice I ever got about child-rearing came from the lady at the Hickory Farms kiosk at the mall “Trust your gut”. Amazing thing is, I have 3 kids (13, 6 & 4) and they’ve all lived past the age of one & survived forward facing carseats without the benefit of Lucky’s expertise. I think I may have met Lucky though when I was pregnant; she was the one who, in my 9th month, shared stories about stillbirths & emergency c-sections with umbilical cords around the neck. Thanks for sharing. Anyway, thanks for the beautiful picture of the beautiful child, clearly taken by folks who love her.

  • seannarae


    I too got a dose of great advice from a Hickory Farms shop at PV mall in Scottsdale AZ back in the mid 80’s.

    “well you little shit! you’re not supposed to touch all this food and put it back when you got yourself pink eye!”

    i think i was 14.

  • Jenny

    I didn’t even notice anything about the carseat. But I don’t have kids. I just have dogs. And I just bungee them to the roof.

  • Lushlife

    Can only – say great post – loved the Dukes of Hazzard’s reference. And I never even noticed the car seat thing – some people are just so nitpicky and have wayyyyyy too much time on their hands.

  • joh3n

    DAMMIT. I have been trying to get in the New York Times for YEARS now, and Leta BEAT ME TO IT. She doesnt even have all her TEETH YET.

    I feel so ashamed.

  • Lisa

    Regarding Lucky’s post (and what an inappropriate name for such a doom-and-gloom type personality!) … I am an RN who has worked in a private pediatric office the past 5 years. However, I do not feel that qualifies me to diagnose children who I have only seen glimpses of that their parents so generously share with us via a blog. And it is not helpful to share worst-case scenarios of an unrelated person. Yes, it is true that the party line is rear-facing in the car seat until at least 20 pounds AND 1 year of age. Because it is not simply size but also development of head/neck control and strength. So this is what I educate my parents with. BUT given that, anyone who works with children knows there is a HUGE range of normal growth and development. Some 1 year olds are only 16 pounds, may have been premature, may have other issues. Some 1 year olds are 28 pounds and running marathons. Some babies walk at 9 months. Some not until 15 months. All of these things are normal. Despite my position of not making statements based on a small amount of information learned long-distance on a blog… it seems obvious to me that Jon and Heather love, care for, and want only the best for Leta. It seems obvious that they have the resources – intellectual, emotional, financial – to provide the best for her. Unfortunately that is not true of all parents for various reasons. It seems obvious that Leta is a happy, loved, well-adjusted baby who is developing beautifully. So let’s give Jon & Heather our love and support for so generously sharing their lives with us and making our days by doing so. Let’s not give them grief!

  • Honey Bunny

    oh my god, jon, you’re the best.

  • Honey Bunny

    oh yeah.

    Lucky, you’re a bitch.

    CAN IT!

  • whatever

    The Britax Marathon is commercially available, and unless your one year old is several inches taller than my three year old, it has plenty of room rear facing for a very long time.

    But hey – risk your own child’s life in a wreck if you please. Me, I’m too paranoid to do that.

  • Lisa

    I’m just curious if anyone has ever left unsolicited advice in the “comments” section and attached a real, functional e-mail address.

  • diane

    Wow, if I ever have children, remind me not to keep up my blog. I mean, how the hell are you supposed to walk into parenthood being completely and utterly above criticism? Eek. Once upon a time we didn’t even know much more than to PUT a kid in a carseat and yet most kids were pretty much okay.
    I agree that the internet needs to CHILL. It’s sad that people out there have so much spare time on their hands that they think they have all the facts and statistics about your day to day life just because they read random anecdotes & snippets of your life in a blog. Anyway, in all of this I heartily admire the grace with which you handle such morons. Today’s entry had me laughing heartily, especially the first photo with the arrow indicating where Leta was. :)
    Oh, and if you don’t have a blog, don’t ever criticize someone who does for being overly sensitive. Most of the time my readers are local and long lost buds who just like to read about my latest happenings. No one should have to be subjected to public abuse just for writing about their life.

  • elliott

    what’s the point of comments if you don’t want people to voice an opinion? I think you both are tremendous people, and I spend WAY too much time following your lives, but look how many people have left comments on this thread alone! As of this post about 90. If you think you’re not going to get a few negative posts, well I think you’ve got too much faith in humanity. And yes, the in-tanet gives a voice to many opinionated fuckers…

    When I was a kid, nobody used car seats, or seat-belts for that matter- Amazingly, I’m alive to this day…

  • Ivy

    Jon & Heather, I love you two and think you’re wonderful parents. I’ve cringed every time I’ve read that someone has emailed you with a laundry list of what you’re doing “wrong” with Leta. You are obviously completely in love with your little girl and on top of her every need. That said, she really should be rear-facing still. The statistics don’t lie on this one and they are staggering. Regardless of a child being “big” for her age. Actually, “those in the know” recommend rear-facing for much longer than 12 months but the carseat industry has people ready to hop into that next seat ($$$ for them) as soon as possible. Ignore them. Get a Britax Marathon (available everywhere) and not only will it be the safest seat you can buy for her, but she will be able to stay rear-facing for quite some time yet.

  • LIsa

    my kid is 6 months, 21 pounds and is facing forward on the passenger side of the backseat.

    may i burn in hell.

  • dj blurb

    Um. I don’t feel so good about a product that keeps getting mentioned that was recently recalled:

  • SQUE

    I really wouldn’t bother with the haters. Seriously, there will always be those who want to rain on someone elses parade. Fuck’em. They are low-life attention seekers and nothing more, but this is a damn funny post! =]

  • butterstar


    I saw the Dukes of Hazzard in concert once. Tom Wopat & John Schneider. They sang the Dukes theme song. It was way postmodern.

    Rock on, Jon. This post rocked.

  • snazzy

    Well … at the risk of having my head bitten off … I don’t think it’s a big deal that Leta’s facing forward. And although you and Heather didn’t ask … I guess I must say that I didn’t notice from the picture, but if the Xterra allows for the seat to be in the middle, I’d put it there. She’s not going to fly through the window if there’s an accident (WAY too strapped in), but most accidents are side-impact, and even a relatively low-speed impact would crush the door in several feet. While she is encased in a nice safety seat, I still think that’s a little dangerous. And … we went to get a seat check-up before our kid was born last year, and they made it clear the seat should ALWAYS be in the middle. Yeah, I know, who is “they”? Fuck if I remember. It was some outfit associated with the police department.

    Just because someone is offering unsolicited advice, don’t throw it out, yo. You might be missing out on something valuable, just because you were pissed and bitter at their (my?) crappy tone.

    BTW I think you guys seem like incredibly awesome parents. Leta is adorable, and I love to read your blogs. I’m not trying to criticize.

  • Ivy

    Really, try not to take some of this advice as critism. It’s NOT. There is no way anyone can know everything about any topic, let alone parenting and parents passing along bits of advice and cautions is the way its always been done. How else do people find out things like which baby carrier totally rocks and which only makes your back feel like you SLEPT on rocks? 😉 Of course, as you don’t actually KNOW any of us I can see why it would be difficult… But the Britax Marathon really IS known as “the best seat out there” – recall or no. The recall applies to only certain dates of manufacture and is a simple fix at that. We have 2 Marathons for our 2 kids and can’t speak highly enough about them.

    Rock on, Armstrong family.

  • dayna

    i’m a longtime fan….and i felt compelled to post. you two are the kickass-ing-est, rocking-est people/parents/interwebbers. EVER. my 16 month old daughter was in a forward facing carseat at 10 months because she’s a MONSTROUS giant child. at that age, she was wearing size two everything, and weighed 27 pounds. now that she’s six months older & two sizes bigger, i have her in one helluva special EJECTION carseat that will just fling her out thru’ the roof if we should ever get in a smash. till then, let’s keep our fingers crossed that she doesn’t figure out what that big red EJECT button does. whew.
    you guys are the best. happy early birthday, Leta.

  • Kim

    Thus spake “whatever”:n”But hey – risk your own child’s life in a wreck if you please. Me, I’m too paranoid to do that.”

    No, you’re too well paid by the company you shill for to listen to your sense of decency. I know viral marketing is all the rage– but insulting another person in the process is just unconscionable.

  • Carolee

    Thank you for this post! I love your sarcasm!

    When I saw your pictures of Leta in the carseat, my first thought was “Ooooh, nice car seat. What brand is it?”. You and Heather should be paid for product placement.

    Take care, and keep up the posts. I really enjoy them.

  • Michael

    Is it just me or does Britax sound like a badass name for a cartoon character? I can’t think of what kind exactly (the mind jumps to something with an axe, of course) but I think of Transformers and something related to an addax (some kind of African antelope) – maybe a metal transforming deer of some kind?

    Either that, or it’s some kind of disease. Like Anthrax, but only British people can catch it.

  • heathabee

    laughed my ass off at the little red arrow pointing at where Leta would be.

    Clearly you guys are great parents.. and the people who feel the need to weigh in are all egotisitical “know-it-all”s who suck and who should back-the-eff-off.

    Continue doing your thang. Screw ’em.

  • Laurie

    To give her credit, I think that Lucky had some good intentions, but it did veer towards being very negative and scary.

    That said, I may have gotten some criminal court training in law school, but you won’t see me giving advice about a criminal trial. Give me the cultural property law where I just have to deal with mayan pots and papers all day. Basically, it’s virtually impossible to make a judgement call on a)something you aren’t specfically trained on and b) that you don’t have direct experience with. Seeing a picture online and reading a blog entry does not a diagnosis make.

    And I should know, my brother’s a pediatric surgeon…:-)

    Now your treatment of Chuck on the other hand…..:)

  • whatever

    Hey, Kim. Do you think you could get me a viral marketing job for Britax, because that would be really cool.

    Maybe then I wouldn’t have to shell out money to buy the car seats like everyone else.

  • Michelle

    Britax sounds like a sanitary napkin/feminine product.